post-all

i've been reading your blog assiduously, and your very evident happiness after we decided to go separate ways sure ain't doing much to my ego. what if pple get the impression that i'm a terrible b/f? haha. trivial comments aside, i'm really happy that you're the way you are now. i haven't seen that peilee for a very long while and i'm glad u've regained that side of yours I so admired and enjoyed seeing in you.

my dad commented on the way back (yes, no public transport for me haha) that he hadn't seen me so genuinely relaxed and in such an easy-going mood since we got together. not that i'm saying i wasn't happy when i was with you.. but it was kind of a fluctuating mood swing thingy then - either lost in blissfulness or wallowing in despair, indignance or helplessness. and i enjoyed singing chinese oldies throughout the whole trip back. yep, lots of memories does flow back.. the sweet ones :)

and i truly do believe what we both feel now is not the kind of happiness one desires to make oneself feel when wishing to justify one's decision after a breakup, but that of true and genuine joyfulness that comes from being at peace with oneself.

i guess friendship was always the best course for the two of us. but i must say the progression from there to being in a relationship was a natural one, albeit not a correct choice given how things turned out. i believe, though, that both of us enjoyed the short journey, or at least most of it. i would say it opened our eyes to what was really important to us in our lives. our friendship with each other, for one. and numerous others which only ourselves know.

alot of my friends did comment abt the shortness of our r/ship, and i attributed it to my own inadequacy as well as our clash in personalities and habits. in no way could i see it being any fault of yours. but i have to say i'm proud of the both of us for being able and willing to end things sooner rather than simply dragging things on, suffering, and hoping things will turn out for the better. seeing how the both of us are feeling now, the decision was a good one, indeed. it was in great part due to you - i thank you for doing so, and in the midst preventing my wavering.

exams are coming and it'll be a trying period for the both of us given the fact that we haven't spent much time on our studies this sem, hehh. sighs. i'm sure you'll do fine too, tho. don't know anyone like you who can fare reasonably well despite the absymal effort put in. but less intelligent beings like me have to simply toil during the next few weeks, i guess :(

yep. 'll be looking forward to our next meeting. it's a new start once again and I believe our lives have been the better for it.