the triple As

one of the modules i take in NIE's professional communication, and the graded tasks include an oral presentation on topics teachers face (like briefing overseas scholars on life and work in SG, announcements to the sch, etc), a podcast (on colloquial english and ur views on it) as well as e-mails to superiors as well as class participation.

so today was the last day of lessons, and the podcast pairs were called one-by-one to get their grades for all save the e-mail assignment. well, i only rehearsed twice to myself for the OP, the podcast was a do once and submit effort (most other friends submitted after about 5 attempts), completed the written e-mail in 10mins when others handed in at the alloted time of 30mins, and my attempts at class participation were open attacks of sarcasm at the lecturer or snide comments (puns and 'ahem' references) to my friends so loud that half the class of 30 could hear.

obviously i din pay much heed to the module. afterall, i do believe that written (grammar, expression) and spoken ability stops developing much after 12 - recall reading an article on that. and ok la, i was quite confident it'll be a breeze and i always have a heck-care attitude towards sch ahhaha (bad teacher!).

so hmm, i got As for all the above, esp surprising for the class participation bit. think the angmoh guy found me v vocal for an asian and surprisingly amusing. they have a different sense of humour i guess. i dun know my grade for the e-mail assignment but i'm quite sure from my subpar efforts for the other assignments (which i A-ed) that i should get an A for it too. heh!

jue

today i was tired and bored in the lib with my phy/chem NIE friends. and was scrolling through my ginormous msn list (mostly from hall pple). and then i proceeded to do the rightclick, delete contact, enter on about 20 of them. ok at this point i think my bro (or some other pple) will think: delete for what! just keep there la. wun die one right.

i just dun want to be reminded tt the young, naive me actually invested time and sincere effort to know these pple whom i now barely talk to and who barely care to contact me and whom both parties barely have any interest in talking to each other. yes, it doesn't hurt to keep them, but i dun want to.

i'm quite jue in most aspects i guess. even as i may appear harmless, friendly and a nice little pushover. when i decide that someone isn't putting in half the effort i am to maintain the f/s, i enter into a state of mind that it's likely to happen in the future and i mentally delete the person from my mind. but of course there are exceptions la. hahah.

so kaypoh

today i was happily reading the guy's blog (again) and it's not been gg v well for him. i dun want to be so nasty as to say i alr saw it coming (likely he did too) but yeah, there're tell-tale signs for every of these cases and i think i'm one of the few who would know better ba hahaha.

i always like to acquire pple's experiences and derive lessons learnt from them. in this case i would have to say the lesson's not to take the other party for granted - resentment builds up to a tipping point eventually . just like one of my favorite mantras in life: prevention is better than cure. which i learnt through many painful experiences (not all r/s based la! knee also).

the touch

today i chanced upon a blog written by a guy (whom i can't say i know very well) and it really did touch me how he expressed his love for his gf (hopefully so). it wasn't exactly the type of flowery english, heck, it wasn't even proper english. and coming from a language snob like me, i have to say it's quite amazing his words affected me so.

i always pride myself at being able to decently read the feelings and hidden nuances in words, spoken or written, and i sensed no form of deceit or manipulation in them. only sincerity, regret and may i say, true love. yes, i would have been easily able to produce something seemingly more effective in half the time he took to write whichever entry, but it would definitely lack the impact his had to his significant other.

the feelings do count in writing. and that's why i seize any opportunity which brings out the writer in me, such as i can enjoy the flow of translating my inner thoughts directly into the spoken word. of which i have yet to really grasp. but then again, how many can truly master this? very few, i should say. (direct spoken to written translation doesn't count)

ohwells i do wish that guy all the best. everyone is entitled to their own opinion and i have mine, definitely, about how i expect it to turn out. human nature. even if others doesn't vocalise/act out their thoughts, doesn't mean they dun think it silently themselves. but then again if everyone were uninhibited in their expression, it would be quite a chaotic situation indeed.

where are the nice guys

trigger: the supper buddy who always seems to be constantly involved with other parties even tho he keeps insisting "i love my gf v much and i think she's the best for me".

this particular friend of mine who indulges in weekly clubbing (waste of $ and low yield-time ratio i feel) argues that one gets bored w the current gf after a matter of time, and says tt unless she is outstanding in comparison with the ones the guy meets, is there for the guy most of the time and is really caring/understanding etc, things are bound to happen.

i wouldn't say i agree with him, but i would say that with the exception of TWO guys amongst all that i know well (and it's quite considerable i must say, given that most trust me and i elicit the worst out of them), the rest have harboured thoughts (or have alr engaged in) betrayal of some sort.

physical betrayal i can't condone (why can't you just do yourself? faster, more convenient and likely better, i comment to them w a wink and smile) but emotional betrayal, it's subtle as in most guys don't even know they're engaging in it or rather pretend that they're not, instead choosing to say "but she's just a friend!". then again that could be true too. for it's but a thin line btw the two.

happened to read this article from a link when checking my hotmail:

http://lifestyle.sg.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=3645897

think it summarises emotional betrayal v succinctly.

so normally i ask: do you: 1. share your thoughts, feelings, and problems with your friend instead of your partner? 2. give them personal gifts without an occassion? 3. get annoyed with your partner because it seems like your "friend" understands you better? 4. keep your friendship a secret from your partner?

and most of those attached friends of mine, without any further commenting on my part, answers the 1st 3 qns positively then sheepishly try to justify themselves on the last qn by stating that "but i told my gf abt the girl before!" then after a silent pause "ok la, not entirely". terrible right.

oh but then there's a silver lining to every undesirable situation. the above, of course will never happen in many cases, such as the readers' (you). but due to me being bored, i have happily classified those non-applicable scenarios nicely as belows:

1. "honeymoon" the relationship is less than 3mths old and both of you are still in la-la land.

2. "bored and alone" both of you dun meet up proper for more than once a week (busyness not really an excuse - SG so small cannot even meet for a meal meh). which helps to extend the la-la land period but which eventually gives the guy (and maybe the girl) free time for others to enter. no pun intended.

3. "the outstanding gf" pretty, caring, understanding, sweet yet knows how to rein him in subtlely such that the bf never really takes the girl for granted nor feels she's manipulative.

4. "the herd" with regards to no.3, maturity on the part of the guy's friends: to know and constantly remind him that once he engages in deviant behaviour, he is likely to lose his wonderful/irreplaceable gf.

5. "i'm a loser" the bf has such low self-esteem that he feels you're the queen of his world and will do ath to keep you (and nth that will repulse you).

6. "i'm not a loser, but everyone thinks i am" the bf is so hopelessly unattractive (horrible looks, poor qualities, lack of social skills that even if he wanted to stray, it'll likely be in his own room).

7. "alpha male" other than work, his hobbies involve gaming, TV-ing, soccer or other male-sports. and he's lazy to know new pple in general.

hmm i'm sure there's more and i'm sure that maybe it's just my male social circle and i'm sure there're more guys out there who are wonderful/nice and i'm sure that your bf (if you're female and attached) is one great guy so dun go bashing me and my Humble views here. hehhh.

obviously i dun have a v high opinion of guys in general (generally childish, insensitive, superficial and horny even tho their female frens/gfs dun know) and i have alot of fun talking abt it with fellow guys (and some cognizant girls) and revelling in the sharing process.

me? hmm my personal mantra regarding this and whom i always like to say: never do ath which would cause you to lose sleep at night. and also: the grass will always/eventually seem greener on the other side, but stay where you are as long as the grass u're on is sufficiently green. yupp.

working weekend

due to overplaying the past weekend and the deluge of deadlines to meet for the next 2 weeks, i have imposed a stay-home-do-work weekend this week. with the exception of the evening family bowling session and golfing lessons/test tml morn too. heh.

ohwells time to get some work gg. no more playing of games (actually it's just farmville and winning eleven now haha) for the next 2 days and the regular manga comes out every fri so i guess it's just the soccernet/goal.com updates and the newspapers that'll take me away from work. oh and of course the occasional 'compulsory' activity.

like working out at home (sat) and swim after golf (sun). haha.

bowling

due to busyness with work (and gg out with the gf), i haven't had my weekly bowling session with the dad for a while.

one fine day recently (when i was less busy), i passed by his rm and saw him watching the korean drama dvds my mum had acquired lately, looking like a total couch potato.

'eh dee dun be like mummy nth to do, whole day watch korean drama. go bowling la!" no la, he doesn't watch alot of TV normally, often preferring to spend time on photography/videography/aircraft modelling. more constructive, these. haha.

so we went bowling, both of us haven't played for almost a mth or so. surprisingly, the scores were quite decent, with me getting a 180 average and the dad a 195.

during the last game, i racked up a very respectable 129 score at the midway point and was quite sure i'd break the 200 mark easily, but yet i was under no illusion anytime that i would win the game. i mean, just look below. no chance la!

if one wishes to know me better, i should say, watching me bowl will allow for discovery about my true inner personality. i think it's the one sport that really elicits a range of emotions within me and causes me to display them openly. at least my parents and bro never fail to look amused. hahaha.

i'm thinking of entering a small tournament organised by the local CC on Nov 15. think every one of them allows one the exhilaration of playing under pressure conditions as well as bring out the competitiveness within me. i know i'm nowhere near national team standards but i believe i'm decent enough to not throw face in any competitions. i think. heh.

jumpiness

i realise i'm a v jumpy person. not that i do evil things such that i'm easily startled la (albeit i say alot of evil things), but its one trait i've always had since young. and esp when i'm in deep thought and prolonged focus.

had just bathed after a workout at night, and one ear had earphones plugged into the laptop whilst i did work on it in air-conditioned comfort. was happily belting out 'nothing's gg to change my lurrve for youuuu' when i noticed something in the vicinity. then turned ard to see the bert, hamster in hand.

i positively jumped in my seat, shouting 'wtf hamster!'

ah hell, next time i should just keep my door fully closed or plug music into both ears. now i feel like an emasculated man.

busyness

ok i decided to do a quick post to remind my readers that i'm not out of business yet. actually i figure that when i don't post, it's actually a good thing cos i only like to blog when i'm feeling emo. but hor, the gf will complain if i don't. so here i am.

i've been v busy the past 2 weeks with assignments/presentations/e-learning, hence explaining my disappearance. and oh touching on the topic of busyness, when pple tell me they're busy, i wonder what their busyness entails.

for me, honestly, i'm rarely BUSY - i don't spend every waking minute doing work and have little time even for proper rest, or have to eat on the go. sometimes i feel pple include the time they spend on gg out with friends, having long lunches/chats, msn-ing/talking on the phone randomly, watching tv or indulging in physical gratification as part of their so-called BUSY time.

obviously if you do the above you will have less time for work. and if you still complain that ur workload is oh so heavy, you deserve to be slapped, i feel. heh! seriously, unless you're a perfectionist or a 1st/2nd-upper class hons student, school/NIE/work shouldn't be BUSY all the time la.

that's why i get upset when certain pple dance ard my attempts to ask them out for a meal using that damn word. and i'm quite amused that i actually got subtly rebuffed so many times by a particular person D from hall whom i used to be close to. normally i view most friends as dispensable so it was surprising i kept persisting haha.

ok enough of the whining.

b-day cards

someone said that i should update my blog so here i am. and i'm finally done with the 2 individual assignments! been working so hard on it as compared to my usual slack self haha. my mum even commented after i spent an entire weekend infront of my desk: i haven't seen you so guai and hardworking for how long alr!

imagine taking 5.5 modules in NUS, all of them CA (continual assessment) based. sometimes i barely manage to catch up with the lessons. but i guess it's still better than FYP. that one hor, really pointless i feel. yes yes i know u get more pay and have better career prospects but in my line of work the extra yr's really quite useless. and i abhor lab work anyways.

let's talk about my b-day (which is damn long ago)! hmm i received quite a few cards, of which some were really well-written and touching. i'm a fan of words (infact i'm quite particular abt the written word) and being able to read stuff which is insightful and shows understanding of oneself, really makes me feel loved. of course i loved the gifts too. and the meal treats (sangi, linky).

ok i've just eaten so i can't exactly go jog now. shall write mundane stuff (analysing the cards!) until 20 mins later when i shall leave for a spot of exercise.

the above card was from my dear (0ld) flaggers. a v typical one, with some traces of unfamiliarity (random greetings from those i'm not so close to) and insightful comments from a certain few. eh kns lor, more than half of them addressed me as 'himbo' in their greetings. your fault, dilys. i'm like, how intelligent and mature can! hahahaa.

next is the tiny playing cards-esque b-day greetings from lalaa. budget issit! coin included to give idea of the scale. you know, i do agree with alot of things u said in the card. but i guess it can't be helped la. go with the flow and see ba!

next up, my dear friend of 3 years charm! a very annoying card indeed. i stopped reading it on the train cos i felt it made me look stupid rotating it ACW constantly. a cute card with cute handwriting from a friend who's always been there and willing to listen/share.

from another dear friend of mine whom i really appreciate for keeping me in check and giving me a different perspective (we're totally different) of issues at time. the card hor, the best la, i told her. where got pple tear off a page from A4 scrapbook and not cut off the edges one! she assured me she does it to all her friends. good job glad, you have the honour of being the friend with the messiest handwriting (and the wordiest smses and mails). not hair too now, at least.

no prizes for guessing who made this. i've always been one for the content and not so appearance but this.. giant collage (do u call it that) really stunned me when i saw it. the effort that went into it is simply unimaginable. it's something the non-artistic me can never do. for the small little plates with words, i later realised that it's not randomly placed, but actually constitutes meaning.

hmm and to think we were still friends (2mths?) when you gave me this. not that u din suspect i would pop the question that very day la. i expect something more gigantic in the future now that we're on a different level now! hehhh. it'll be hard to do smth way better than this la. but u can try :)

thanks everybody!